Today's lectionary reading was from Job. I was a little uneasy when I saw that...there have been so many bad sermons preached on Job and I had no idea who this preacher is. He decided to go with Jesus and the Rich Young Ruler (and did a great job with it, by the way). But I was struck by the reading from Job...It was Job's complaint.
"Today my complaint is bitter; his hand is heavy despite my groaning. Oh, that I knew where I might find him, that I might come even to his dwelling...If I go forward, he is not there; or backward, I cannot perceive him; on the left he hides, and I cannot behold him; I turn to the right, but I cannot see him. But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me I shall come out like gold." (Job 23:1a, 8-10).
I had a flash of recognition there -- I do a lot of complaining about what God allows to happen. But I heard something new in Job's complaint...that he cannot find God looking ahead or behind, to the left or to the right. I've been going through a period of spiritual dryness lately. I think I had gotten to a place, not of being burned out, but of being empty, having poured myself out and poured myself emotionally and spiritually, without having taking the time to refill myself. I've been feeling the absence of God. It doesn't frighten me, because I know everyone has dry spells, but it's not a comfortable place to be. I know that I need to reshape the practices I use to keep myself connected to the Spirit - I'm not doing regular worship and sermon preparation, regular disciplined Bible study. I need to figure out how to do that in retirement.
But Job was a good reminder, that God is not before or behind us, not to the left or the right. God is here, right here, right now. The Presence is in the Present. Where we are, right here, right now.
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