I had a moment of panic this morning as I realized that I am less than two weeks away from the first Sunday of Advent and that I have done no preparation for the readings for lighting the Advent Wreath. And every pastor knows that even with four FULL weeks of Advent for preparation for Christmas (a rarity to have the fourth full week) from Thanksgiving to Christmas Eve feels more like four hours than four weeks. It's not just the emotional and frankly sentimental ties we have to Christmas in church (Most of which are largely only as old as the Victorian era, but that's another argument altogether) -- it's the expectations of visits to shut-ins, special gatherings, special services, special mailings and concerts. All in addition to our normal life in community.
I offer a "Longest Night", sometimes called a "Blue Christmas" service for folks who are having a hard time with the cultural emphasis on being "merry and bright" -- I've done it enough times that it's pretty well formed, but I do like to tweak it and think about ways to both make it more meaningful and ways to make it meaningful for those who might have attended before. It's one of those services that requires as much preparation if you're going to have three people in the congregation as it would if there were 300. There's the special program where the children present their Christmas program -- I don't have responsibility for any of that because I have wonderful lay leaders who take charge, but I do still carry anxiety about it. There's the weekly Advent candle service at the beginning of worship. Most years I try to create some at home resources for people to use throughout the week for Advent. No, I haven't started that, either.
My point is that it's NOVEMBER 8, and I'm already feeling like I'm behind, dreadfully behind for Christmas. And I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get through Christmas, take vacation, and be prepared for that presentation at the end of January, by which time I will be deeply into preparation for Lent and Easter...There's sure to be snow on the ground when I'm working on the Pentecost service, which will take place Memorial Day weekend this year...
This is church life. In order to do it well, you are often out of sync with the reality of what is happening TODAY. Woe to the pastor who does not leave enough time to finish material so it can go into the mail to get to the newsletter which will go out three weeks before the event...
And yet....it is a glorious fall day outside my window. The white bell tower of our classic New England meeting house is brilliant against a clear blue sky. The leaves that survived the snow are still brilliant with color. It is a day to drink in, a day to savor, a day to let yourself be filled with gratitude and joy. Thanksgiving has long been my favorite holiday and it troubles me that it has gotten so divorced from its roots of thankfulness to the Creator for all that is. It's hard to get the committed church folks to a service of Thanksgiving, let alone a general community of folks. And I hate the way the pressures of Advent and Christmas distract me from a celebration of Thanksgiving.
On my Facebook page I've started doing Thirty Days of Gratitude for November -- a way to pause and really appreciate the things both essential and frivolous that bring beauty, joy, meaning, ease, pleasure to my day. I also received a "day book" as a gift, but it really is too small for the kind of calendar I keep. So I decided I'm making it my gratitude journal, listing the things for which I'm grateful each day throughout the coming year. Even if I'm thinking in and working on the future, I'm committing myself to living and being focused in today, even if it's only part of the day.
Thinking eschatalogically (about the end of Time or the end of Times) Christians are called to live as if the Kingdom has come in fulness, but we do it in these "not yet" times. So we live in hope. Which is really what Advent is all about anyway.
