Mu-uther-in-law! Mother-in-law!
I remember that very old song from a cover by Herman's Hermits, back in the early, early 60s. This past month, I BECAME a mother-in-law, something I've been waiting for for nearly 10 years now. I'm so delighted to welcome the son-in-law, to have shared that momentous life passage with my daughter. It's a very strange experience when your daughter suddenly has a new name. Nothing changes, and everything changes.
I hope I will be a good mother-in-law. My son-in-law's mom died when he was a teen. His dad remarried just this last year. I don't ever want to take his mom's place; I never could and it would be foolish to try. But I hope that he'll think of me as "another mom", like some of the women to whom I've looked in my life when I needed the perspective of someone I knew cared about what happened to me, someone who wanted the best for me and who would tell me the truth when I needed to hear it. I hope that he will forgive me when I'm pushy because I want the best for his family, who just happen to be my daughter and grandsons. I hope he'll put up with me when I remind him that this crazy family came along with his wife, and that we love him whether he wants us to or not.
I hope, most of all, that he doesn't think of me as the worst person he knows.
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
The Tempest in the...Cup
So I haven't actually SEEN anyone who said they were going to boycott the Coffee Empire because of their "anti-Christmas" cup, just lots of folks who are roused and sputtering, or withering and disdainful, or pious and redirecting in response. I've indulged in the last two responses myself.
This leads me to wonder where this all comes from, and I've decided that the whole "War on Christmas" thing really has outlived its usefulness to whomever STARTED it and it is now being kept alive on artificial life support by those who have benefited from pointing out how stupid it was to begin with.
Yes, I used the "s" word.
As we embarked on our Florida adventure I needed to pare down the "things" we were storing and moving. I also wanted to think about separating the celebration "requirements" from the celebration essentials. I got rid of the snowmen and most of the Santas, keeping the ones that looked more like they might actually be the Bishop of Smyrna and not the shill for Coke. I got rid of all the fake greenery that represented my Scandinavian and German ancestors' attempts to provide a resting place for evil spirits and which supposedly began to be used in Christian homes to represent eternal life and everlasting love (when it was real evergreen, not textured polyester). I got rid of most of the green and red stuff because those colors seemed to me to be more representative of a northern Christmas. I have not a shred of fact to back that up, it was just a gut feeling.
Anyway, my desire to have a Christmas celebration that was more reflective of my new locale was made a necessity by the Beloved's decision that we were NOT going to empty our storage unit in Massachusetts until we have a house in which to put the contents. That is not going to happen before Christmas.
And I have to tell you, it is a surreal experience to walk into a store and see a fully lit and decorated faux-Blue Spruce Christmas Tree when it is 81 degrees out and you are in shorts and flip-flops. It's wrong. Just wrong. I'm delighted to learn that there are pine trees here, because I can have a real greenery wreath, and of course pointsettias (forced out of season, I know, but still, far more plausible than snow-flakes!). Stars are universal, and I will have to find a nativity set, which to me is the most important representation of the Christmas message.
Is it more Christmas-y to buy a Santa made in China (a place not known for a lot of Christmas Spirit) at a store where they say "Merry Christmas" or to purchase gloves for someone who needs them at a store where they wish you "Happy Holidays"?
My point is this: I do not require that the people from whom I purchase things believe in the same things or celebrate holidays the way I do. That would be hard, 'cause I'm kind of quirky. I DO, however, try NOT to support companies whose policies violate what I believe God requires of us: to love mercy, to seek justice, and to walk humble with others.
So I am boycotting the products of a mega-company that sells food products because their CEO doesn't think that you have a right to clean drinking water if you can't pay for it. I recently decided that I will not buy chocolate candy from a number of companies until they stop buying their cocoa from suppliers who use child labor. I LOVE chocolate, but I can't enjoy it when I know it was harvested by a nine year old who is held in virtual slavery so that it's cheap for me. I don't know that it will make a difference in either case, but I don't have to contribute my support to such things. And yes, I'm willing to pay a dollar more per bag for fair trade coffee. And I'll look for that nativity set at a fair trade store.
And, in truth, as I understand the Gospel, I don't think Jesus would care a whole lot about our celebration of Christmas (which is a slang name for what the Church calls The Feast of the Incarnation) at all except that we understand it not merely as "the birth of MY Savior" but as the starting point of God's example of how we are to regard each other, treat each other. The Apostle Paul reminds us that the meaning of Christmas is this, that Christ didn't consider that it was enough to be the same as God, but rid himself of the right to glory and adoration, taking the life of a slave and honoring, serving, and lifting up those who were poor and broken and powerless (Philippians 2). If our Christmas doesn't proclaim that, all the snowflakes and reindeer and tinsel in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
This leads me to wonder where this all comes from, and I've decided that the whole "War on Christmas" thing really has outlived its usefulness to whomever STARTED it and it is now being kept alive on artificial life support by those who have benefited from pointing out how stupid it was to begin with.
Yes, I used the "s" word.
As we embarked on our Florida adventure I needed to pare down the "things" we were storing and moving. I also wanted to think about separating the celebration "requirements" from the celebration essentials. I got rid of the snowmen and most of the Santas, keeping the ones that looked more like they might actually be the Bishop of Smyrna and not the shill for Coke. I got rid of all the fake greenery that represented my Scandinavian and German ancestors' attempts to provide a resting place for evil spirits and which supposedly began to be used in Christian homes to represent eternal life and everlasting love (when it was real evergreen, not textured polyester). I got rid of most of the green and red stuff because those colors seemed to me to be more representative of a northern Christmas. I have not a shred of fact to back that up, it was just a gut feeling.
Anyway, my desire to have a Christmas celebration that was more reflective of my new locale was made a necessity by the Beloved's decision that we were NOT going to empty our storage unit in Massachusetts until we have a house in which to put the contents. That is not going to happen before Christmas.
And I have to tell you, it is a surreal experience to walk into a store and see a fully lit and decorated faux-Blue Spruce Christmas Tree when it is 81 degrees out and you are in shorts and flip-flops. It's wrong. Just wrong. I'm delighted to learn that there are pine trees here, because I can have a real greenery wreath, and of course pointsettias (forced out of season, I know, but still, far more plausible than snow-flakes!). Stars are universal, and I will have to find a nativity set, which to me is the most important representation of the Christmas message.
Is it more Christmas-y to buy a Santa made in China (a place not known for a lot of Christmas Spirit) at a store where they say "Merry Christmas" or to purchase gloves for someone who needs them at a store where they wish you "Happy Holidays"?
My point is this: I do not require that the people from whom I purchase things believe in the same things or celebrate holidays the way I do. That would be hard, 'cause I'm kind of quirky. I DO, however, try NOT to support companies whose policies violate what I believe God requires of us: to love mercy, to seek justice, and to walk humble with others.
So I am boycotting the products of a mega-company that sells food products because their CEO doesn't think that you have a right to clean drinking water if you can't pay for it. I recently decided that I will not buy chocolate candy from a number of companies until they stop buying their cocoa from suppliers who use child labor. I LOVE chocolate, but I can't enjoy it when I know it was harvested by a nine year old who is held in virtual slavery so that it's cheap for me. I don't know that it will make a difference in either case, but I don't have to contribute my support to such things. And yes, I'm willing to pay a dollar more per bag for fair trade coffee. And I'll look for that nativity set at a fair trade store.
And, in truth, as I understand the Gospel, I don't think Jesus would care a whole lot about our celebration of Christmas (which is a slang name for what the Church calls The Feast of the Incarnation) at all except that we understand it not merely as "the birth of MY Savior" but as the starting point of God's example of how we are to regard each other, treat each other. The Apostle Paul reminds us that the meaning of Christmas is this, that Christ didn't consider that it was enough to be the same as God, but rid himself of the right to glory and adoration, taking the life of a slave and honoring, serving, and lifting up those who were poor and broken and powerless (Philippians 2). If our Christmas doesn't proclaim that, all the snowflakes and reindeer and tinsel in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
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